I try to be nice to people—but I don’t always enjoy it.
You’ve probably heard that no good deed goes unpunished! Well, depending on your definition of punishment, that principle seems to almost always prove itself true in my experience with doing good deeds. Almost always, in some small or big way, I am inconvenienced, taken for granted, abused, or even rejected when I try to do something nice—or at least I am afraid of being inconvenienced, abused, taken for granted or rejected. Maybe my fear just makes it worse. (I also have a propensity for messing up even the smallest favor. As my dad would say, I could mess up a one-car funeral.)
No good deed goes unpunished!
Part of our plan for more purposeful living involves doing something with or for others at least once or twice a month. As we were thinking through a list of “nice things to do for others,” a small part of me groaned, even as I looked forward to doing the items on the list. And, of course, I immediately recognized this as an area in which I need to grow.
This week, I’ve been thinking a lot about the inconvenience of kindness, and I think there’s a good reason for it.
Love, hospitality, righteousness, even just being nice—these are all only as valuable as the sacrifice or inconvenience involved in practicing them. As a selfish human, this isn’t something I like to hear. Though I derive great pleasure from being nice simply for the sake of being nice, the risk of negative repercussions has often kept me from doing something good for someone.
This is probably why Christ warned against doing good deeds to get a human response. (“That your charitable deed may be in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will Himself reward you openly” [Matthew 6:4 NKJV].) He knew that being reward for doing good deeds might give us a big head and rob us of a heavenly reward, and He knew that being repaid with unkindness or no repayment at all would discourage us from doing good things. God wants us to have a higher motivation for doing good—for the least of these, for Him
I’ve been thinking a lot about the inconvenience of kindness.
On Tuesday morning—Valentine’s Day—we were walking Dudley around our apartments before work. As we rounded the last corner, a big muddy Husky came walking up to us dragging a tattered rope. Clearly, he had broken free from his tether.
Though I love animals and felt sorry for him, I probably would have hurried by because I was afraid he might bite me, afraid he might make me late to work, afraid he might drag me across the parking lot. In other words, I was afraid he might inconvenience my otherwise well-laid-out Tuesday. Laura was the one who picked up the rope and dutifully led him like a small horse back to our apartment.
And sure enough, he did inconvenience us. He muddied Laura’s white coat and my red sweater. And by the time we called animal control and got him tied up and got Dudley calmed down, I was going to be late for work. So I emailed my manager and switched my work-from-home day from Thursday to Tuesday. And, well, you know how a routine is when a Tuesday turns into a Thursday—the rest of the week is thrown off.
But if I had walked by him, gone into work on Tuesday, and worked from home today, I wouldn’t have gotten this 17-dollar Under Armour water bottle that the assembly speaker gave away this morning.
Sometimes good things come to us when we choose to do good things—not in a karma, formulaic sort of way, but by doing the right thing at the right time.
If we’re honest, contrary to the old saying, we aren’t always punished for our good deeds, and we certainly aren’t always rewarded for them. But doing a good thing is always good enough. And we can let God take care of the rest.
Oh, and the owners, who had been driving around looking for the dog, eventually saw him lying on our front patio. They were happily reunited. The dog’s name was Neeko.